LOVE NEVER LOST OR IS IT?

You and I met when we were both married and it didn't take long to believe the feelings we had for each other, we were consumed by passion beyond blame. You said I stirred in you feelings you didn't even know were there and emotions you have never been capable of showing. You in turn created this longing that caused a lot of pain inside me.


BUT we were not foolish, we both agreed that whatever it is we found we keep to each other; that absolutely no one must know. Too many people on both sides can get hurt in the process if we should declare what we had; that sacrifice was the only alternative.

And so, out of enormous respect for each other, we agreed to continue to live our lives the way we thought best, allowing so very little time for our brief encounters. Yet love flourished to no boundaries; each moment becoming more precious than the one before; loving each other deeply in secret; and agonising greatly each time we had to part.

In a few years I lost my husband to illness and some guilt came to pass. I did love him, too, and he didn't go unloved nor hurt. After a while, when the grieving process with my son was over, I saw you again in secret. We knew we cannot stop seeing each other. We were not just lovers, we became best friends. Just like before, our meetings were short and rare, stolen by design, not allowing any soul to even suspect our special bond.

I put my life on hold for you. I became incapable of finding another love interest. Each opportunity I had was quickly put to rest. I knew that no one else can make me feel the way I felt for you. You continued to love me in secret.

Yet a few more years have passed and now, your wife, she's gone, also taken from you by illness. You are devastated. You find out that it was worth the effort to keep the loyalty expected of you intact and for her to go without feeling unloved nor hurt. You come to me as a friend who need to be consoled and wept silently on my shoulder. I said you need to go through a grieving process with your two daughters.

You leave and I don't know what will happen now. You seem so lost and far away.

Are we over?

Cactusflower